The Return of Thursday Confessions

When I was still living in Kansas, I blogged Thursday Confessions every Thursday. I fell out of the habit since I've been back in good ol' Utah, so I've decided to throw out a Thursday Confession for you today.

I'm going to confess to you, my faithful readers (and whoever else ended up stopping by today), my hopes and dreams. There are things I keep to myself about what I want for my future because I'm terrified to make it public knowledge. First of all, I'm embarrassed about what I want. Second of all, I'm a little afraid if I say it out loud it will never happen.

I guess there's a tiny little sliver of a third of all... which is this teensy little voice that tells me everyone would laugh themselves off their chairs if they heard what I thought I might be capable of.


I dream of being a great writer. Not just a writer. A great writer.
I dream of being the kind of writer that makes you want to laugh and then cry and then the hair on the back of your neck stand on end.
I dream of bringing encouragement or education or enlightenment to people through words.
I dream of showing myself more clearly and more honestly than I do now or ever have before.
I dream of reaching that place in life (and society) where I can be 100% me and not hold back. Where I can say what I want to say with exactly the words I want to use, without fear of what someone might think or say to me, especially my family.

I dream of reading great novels.
I dream of going to college.
I dream of going to college SOON.
I dream of being an English major (history minor?).
I dream of teaching English and maybe even history to high school students.

I dream most often of (and here's where it gets especially embarrassing) being an incredible blogger.
The kind that you want to read every morning when you wake up, just to make you laugh or think or cry.
The kind that makes you think, "I want to be friends with this person, even though she's a complete stranger."
I dream of receiving hundreds of comments from strangers, touching peoples' lives I know nothing about. Like DadGoneMad or MyBottlesUp or Motherhood Uncensored... or hundreds of other women blogging flawlessly with hundreds of followers.

I dream of that blog turning into something incredible... like me finally figuring out what my voice is.... and writing a book. One that people would buy. And read.

Okay I'm stopping now before I puke from the embarrassment.

So there it is: my confessions for this Thursday.